Defending My Homeland.

Discussion in 'Outings, Trips & Expeditions' started by Primordial, Mar 9, 2019.

  1. Primordial

    Primordial MOA #40 Supporter Bushcraft Friend

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    So about a month ago there was story being reported out on the news about an explosion in lower Wisconsin. While watching the story they showed a map of the upper midwest and it was then I realized that my beloved Michigan's Upper Peninsula had been invaded and taken over by Canada. I couldn't believe it.

    upcanada.PNG

    ....> https://whtc.com/news/articles/2019/feb/07/wisconsin-tv-station-gives-michigans-up-to-canada/

    I spent the next few weeks gathering supplies and trying to link up communication with the resistance. Today I decided to make my way into occupied land to scout enemy movement and assess the situation.

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    WOLVERINES!!!!!

    As I walked along I discovered sign that a drone was near. Tracks from what was obviously a Canadian jay that was walking atop the snow and took flight at my approach. The enemy could be near.

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    Th snowshoeing conditions were terrible. The snow was sticky and it was building up on the shoes making them weigh more with every step.

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    Repeated walking causes the snow ball up under foot. Every few steps you must to the "snowshoe waggle" to shake it off.

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    A squirrel hole...

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    Some grouse tracks...

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    What are these mounds?

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    Why they are the tops of 5 foot tall trees! No joke.

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    Continued...
     
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  2. Staleym

    Staleym Methuselah's Cohort Supporter

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    Hey there @Primordial. Thanks for your service! Giving you a gold Star. [​IMG]
     
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  3. whtshdwwz

    whtshdwwz Supporter Supporter

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    I would call the Wolverines "Red Dawn" predicted the Canadian invasion...good luck.
     
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  4. Primordial

    Primordial MOA #40 Supporter Bushcraft Friend

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    I still seen no Hosers.

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    I made way through the woods and scanned for enemy movement.

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    Nothing.

    Damn! I hit an air pocket!...

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    Sunk down over a foot.

    Time to set up shop.

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    I took my USAF SKRAM bag and my tractor axle weight Yugo SKS that I modernized years ago. Remember the days when you could buy a SKS for $100? Pepperidge Farm remembers.

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    Secret stash.

    One UCO Storm match did the trick. I love these things.

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    Just a small fire for kicks and grins. I didn't spy any Canadians so I felt safe making the fire...but kept it small just to be safe.

    Time to hydrate.
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    Continued...
     

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  5. J. Pierce

    J. Pierce Perpetually Off Topic, Sorry. Supporter

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    Damn land grabin' Canadians!
    The time has come...............
    We must build a wall!
     
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  6. Beach Hiker

    Beach Hiker LB #42 Supporter Bushcraft Friend

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    @Primordial
    Great stuff!
    BTW, those little mounds are what snow machines (snowmobiles) chop off when cruising around. The trees are "topped" and grow very strangely afterwards (they have to produce an alternative main shoot....).
    P.S. Trying to resist the inevitable Canadian takeover is pointless.
     
  7. Jim L.

    Jim L. Guide

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    "Red Dawn" was perhaps the scariest movie of my youth.
     
  8. randyt

    randyt Guide

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    better hope Rifle Chair doesn't get in on the fray, you'll have your hands full with him.
     
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  9. Primordial

    Primordial MOA #40 Supporter Bushcraft Friend

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    Lame poser shots...

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    It's not a $200 canteen made from adamantium, but it does the trick.

    I smell maple syrup and Molson, or maybe Labatt Blue....they could be close.

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    I pressed on and made contact with the resistance. The oppressed Yoopers reported not much was different than pre occupation times except that the stores now only carry round, disk like bacon and their prescription medications are way cheaper. We planned a few future missions and I made my back, safely across the border with out being seen.

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    The sun was bright today...

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    Thanks for joining me on this mission into enemy territory. The only thing I really was trying to combat is cabin fever.

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    Got snow, Eh?!
     
  10. operatord

    operatord Supporter Supporter

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    Remember Canada gave us Nickelback and Justin Bieber. :26:

    #NEVERFORGET
     
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  11. J. Pierce

    J. Pierce Perpetually Off Topic, Sorry. Supporter

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    LMAO.............. freakin' hilarious!
     
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  12. PACoureurDuBois

    PACoureurDuBois For God and Country Supporter

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    And now a special message for our friends, in the UP, the chair is against the door.

    I say again, the chair is against the door.
     
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  13. whtshdwwz

    whtshdwwz Supporter Supporter

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    If you get a hit of back bacon they are closing in....if you see Bob and Doug McKenzie it's all over.
     
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  14. badgerthehobo

    badgerthehobo Scout

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    Wolverines!

    I’ll dig a pit trap. Bait it with Molson, maple syrup and a dvd of hockey’s biggest fights. It’ll be full in two shakes of a red toque!
     
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  15. Paul Caruso

    Paul Caruso Being all that I am. Supporter

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    Well our wolves have already taken over Isle Royale, it was just a matter of time before we took over the rest. You can keep Detroit, and we’ll also give you Windsor.
     
  16. Ragman

    Ragman Supporter Supporter

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    Dang Canadians!
    Your vigilance is greatly appreciated.
    Time to call Super Troopers!
     
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  17. operatord

    operatord Supporter Supporter

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    Deal, as long as you keep those round things you call bacon away from our children’s schools. They are still young and impressionable. We don’t want them growing up thinking that is actual bacon.
     
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  18. Pablo

    Pablo Guide

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    Yeah, up here on the south shore of Superior, we rotate town militias to patrol the beaches. I've heard the Canuks like to sneak in with radar-absorbing birchbark canoes and attempt to saturate the U.S. economy with Tim Horton's coffee, Tim Bits, and crappy beer in an attempt to destroy us from within. Once in a while we find an enemy camp with a few forgotten french fries and empty mayo packets, and empty Tim Horton's coffee cups. Nothing in this world will make your hair stand on end like seeing such a thing in Wisconsin woods... It's like coming face-to-face with Bigfoot in an RCMP dress uniform... scary stuff.
     
  19. NevadaBlue

    NevadaBlue —- Roughian #7 -— --- Graybeard -— Supporter Bushcraft Friend Bushclass I

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    I used to work in Canada from time to time and remember the ‘Blue Lite Special’ nights. Free food and cheap beer! Hard to beat.

    Yes, I also remember the $100 SKS. I got an unused Tula for that money. Kept it original (after an experiment with a folding stock. Decided it was better off in original form)
     
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  20. FIELDCRAFTLTC

    FIELDCRAFTLTC Supporter Supporter Bushclass I

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    Thank you good sir for your diligence and commitment to keeping us safe from the northern hoards.
     
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  21. Guillaume Longval

    Guillaume Longval Friction Fire Addict

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    i think i could feel at home up there: same climate, place names in french... eh!

    do you have ticks? (they made their way up to montreal, i may have to move north)

    moose? red meat trout?(i think its brook trout in english. cant live without:))

    anyways,
    thanks for taking us along!
     
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  22. Jonah L. Archer

    Jonah L. Archer ~Roughian #21~ Supporter Bushclass II

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  23. Jonah L. Archer

    Jonah L. Archer ~Roughian #21~ Supporter Bushclass II

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    "Hey Canada! You're getting a wall to!... you snow Mexicans..." :18:
     
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  24. Guillaume Longval

    Guillaume Longval Friction Fire Addict

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    as long as it keeps the ticks on your side, im ok with my tax money being used for a wall.:14:
     
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  25. Tdr

    Tdr Scout

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    Looks more like piles of propaganda leaflets than snow too me!
     
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  26. RavenLoon

    RavenLoon axology student Supporter

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    Thanks for your service Patriot. See you at the curling rink, eh?
     
  27. hidden_lion

    hidden_lion Supporter Supporter

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    Great post, lots of fun
     
  28. Tdr

    Tdr Scout

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    You guys, wake me up when they get close to the Mason Dixon line, I'm almost ready, I shudder to think what they would name it. The bacon Dixon line? Maple bacon line?
     
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  29. XMP

    XMP Mountain Man

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    If you encounter heavy Hoser forces, give a shout out and I'll muster the Minnesota Resistance Militia we'll come join you.
     
  30. Metaldog

    Metaldog Just chasing my tail... Supporter Bushcraft Friend

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    Surprised you didn't run into Red Green out there. Good recon mission! :42:
     
  31. Cro

    Cro American Grouch Hobbyist Lifetime Supporter Supporter Bushcraft Friend Bushclass I Bushclass Instructor

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    Awesome post bruh.

    You are the resistance!

    The chair is against the wall, the chair is against the wall.

    John has a long mustache, John has a long mustache.

    PM me a ship to addy, you've won some patches!

    [​IMG]
     
  32. Cro

    Cro American Grouch Hobbyist Lifetime Supporter Supporter Bushcraft Friend Bushclass I Bushclass Instructor

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    It was my favorite movie. That and Heart Break Ridge.
     
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  33. Back50

    Back50 Supporter Supporter

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    They have to be up to something.Otherwise Why would I get busted bringing in 2 cases of Molson Bradors ?
     
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  34. Luchtaine

    Luchtaine MOA #22 Supporter Bushcraft Friend Bushclass I Bushclass Instructor

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    I’m sure as soon as the enemy caught the scent of bacon and Budweiser on the wind they made a full retreat. It’s worth staying vigilant and making sure there are no stragglers or that they don’t return!!
     
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  35. Tdr

    Tdr Scout

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    What about " Devils brigade " yeah I know, pretty corny, I like old corny movies though
     
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  36. badglide9705

    badglide9705 Hobbyist Hobbyist Supporter

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    I`m crackin up here! I don't have to worry about Canadians down here. Way to many FIP`s for Hosers to get their foot in the door!!!:58:
     
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  37. field-expedient

    field-expedient Misfit Bushclass II

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    AVVVVENNNGE MEE!!!!
     
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  38. John from Alberta

    John from Alberta Supporter Supporter

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    You ‘Mericans have fallen for our trap. Posting your scouting trip reports in an enemy infiltrated forum. Rookie move.

    Mooses!! (That’s our version of “wolverines”).
     
  39. Jonah L. Archer

    Jonah L. Archer ~Roughian #21~ Supporter Bushclass II

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    :18::18::18:
     
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  40. Mr. Tettnanger

    Mr. Tettnanger Supporter Supporter

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    Great report!

    Glad that you made it back to friendly soil safely!
     
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  41. J. Pierce

    J. Pierce Perpetually Off Topic, Sorry. Supporter

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    Hey wait.................. Have I been pronouncing it wrong?

    I always thought it was "The Manson/Nixon Line"?
     
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  42. central joe

    central joe Supporter Supporter Bushcraft Friend

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    Thank you for your service lad.
    It looked like a good trip. joe
     
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  43. KenM

    KenM Tracker

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    A wall with Canada? The Canadians are going to pay for it; Right? :33:
     
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  44. J. Pierce

    J. Pierce Perpetually Off Topic, Sorry. Supporter

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    I promise!
     
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  45. R Stowe

    R Stowe Hobbyist Hobbyist Supporter

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    Hahaha. Pepperidge Farms. That made me laugh. Best of luck out there.
     
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  46. Tdr

    Tdr Scout

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    It's easy to spot a bus load of Canadians in the spring, your personal personal vehicle is cleaned up with all the winter grime removed, but there vehicles are pretty easy to spot, they can't sneak up on me! If they were smart they would wash there vehicles before they infiltrate.
     
  47. Staleym

    Staleym Methuselah's Cohort Supporter

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  48. Bdug

    Bdug Scout

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    Bravo good sir, bravo. Thank you for your service and the entertainment! :35:
     
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  49. Metaldog

    Metaldog Just chasing my tail... Supporter Bushcraft Friend

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    This thread reminds me of my workplace. Just a little.

    I work in a downtown high rise. We have a total of 12 elevators, not including the two freight elevators. Our main elevator bank has 8 of them labeled "A to H". The running joke is that elevator "A" is our Canadian elevator. Eh? o_O

    [​IMG]

    LOL. :rolleyes::34:
     
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  50. JeffG

    JeffG Scout

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    "No Hosers!" You're a Cheesehead! Red Dawn from Canada, who would have thought?? Nice rifle!
     
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